Some of my close friends have recently told me that they have lost their faith in God. They recognize they once had faith, but circumstances have changed. How do I be supportive of them (understand where they are coming from) but clearly state my views (tell them what I believe without offending them or pushing them away)?
As the old saying goes, you can’t lift someone up if you’re below them. In spiritual matters we always have to take care of ourselves first, so you should be sure you’re doing everything in your power to improve your own spirituality first. If you’re doing that, the Spirit will generally tell you when to bear testimony to those around you and when to stand as a silent example. It’s important that, while you accept others for who they are, you not allow them to infringe on your right to exercise your beliefs.
For example, when our family gets together at my parents’ house for dinner, we always say a blessing on the food, even though not all of us attend church, because it’s their home and that’s how they do it. But at the same time, they don’t ask someone to pray if they’re not religious. Above all, it’s important to show our family and friends that we love them unconditionally, even when their actions are contrary to our beliefs.
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My husband was religious when I married him, but we went through some tough times, and he turned away from God and towards things that, in my opinion could only make him temporarily happy. At first, I was so dissapointed and angry with him for going against what I thought we both believed. I tended to preach to him to try to get him to see the error of his ways and return to the "correctness" of mine. That only made him turn further away. It put a major stressor on our relationship, and made us both resent each other. Part of showing your faith and love of God is learning to love unconditionally. It has taken me years to figure this out. I knew it in my brain, but I didn't practice it in my own marriage. I have come to accept him for who he is right now. I have learned to focus on the positives which are many, rather than the dissapointment I feel that he has decided not to be religious. When focusing on the positives, this makes him feel better about himself and helps him to be a better person. It helps me to have harmony in my home and a closeness with my family. Sometimes, you just have to let people be who they decide to be. The above advise is great. Just focus on your own spirituality and learn to practice that unconditional love. It is more of an example of the faith you feel than words will be.
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